Asian Money Matters: Part 1 - Childhood Influences
Hello, and welcome to this introduction of Asian Money Matters! I’m Simro, and I’m thrilled to kick off this series exploring finance through the lens of our community.
With a career spanning finance at Accenture and program management in government research, I’ve spent years navigating the world of money, strategy, and decision-making. My academic background—covering business, finance, and project management—has given me the tools to understand not just how money works, but how it can empower individuals and communities.
This series explores the journey from childhood to adulthood, unpacking financial concepts, cultural attitudes, and the emotions behind money decisions. Asian Money Matters offers insights, stories, and discussions on different themes. Each edition will include an activity to inspire reflection and meaningful conversations—because true empowerment begins with open dialogue.
The influence of social media on spending habits
Social media, with the help of the pandemic, has greatly influenced how women interact with their money. Check-out tools are becoming more seamless, encouraging repetition with the art of making spending your money an enjoyable experience. With each transaction we are made to believe that we are the true benefactors, whist behind the surface we have become puppets to a structure built on powerful algorithms. Algorithms leading us to believe that with each purchase we move one step closer towards a more independent, and a more acceptable version of ourselves. A version that perhaps better aligns to the life we desire. A version that a simple plastic card can help manifest. Regardless of the motives, ultimately we are all trying to fill an empty void within, a void Asian women often have little space to nurture.
Shifting the focus: from financial management to emotional awareness
The focus of these issues is not to provide methods of managing financials, but to bring awareness to our emotions. Emotions that are the backbone of each financial action, and re-action. Each article will discuss a different theme. Each theme will be built around a different stage of life, and will include a simple activity. This issue will start with our primary influences during our childhood years. I will include some personal experience to provide some groundwork, and will share reflections in the hopes to inspire and engage readers.
The impact of childhood influences on financial literacy
Asian women are often taught to believe that parents, and male counterparts control their access to money. If we gain independence, we tend to allow external factors to influence our decisions given little has been done to prepare us to engage sensibly with our finances. We may have encountered controlled upbringings, with little access to mentors or strong female teachings, and have all lived our own personal hardships. Experiences during our early years cement the first in many complex layers of our financial literacy. These initial understandings are further reinforced, and re-arranged as we move through different stages of our lives. In taking stock of our past, not with pain and rejection, but with respect and acceptance, we can help set a new stage of financial awareness.
Our childhood years from the outside may seem simple, but under the surface they involve a complex web of interactions. Children are vulnerable to their surroundings, and like sponges absorb their family behaviours as normal. Depending on your relationship with your childhood influencers, your adult financial behaviour can repeat or repel your childhood experiences. Our initial exposures are further refined as we move through different stages of our lives, and as new experiences are layered upon old behaviour patterns. No one simple answer can unravel what drive’s our financial choices. The purpose of these issues are not to find answers, but to help create space so that awareness can begin to unfold. Patterns of behaviour are not simple to change, but with awareness, we can better prepare ourselves to manoeuvre each day as we navigate the world around us, slowly allowing our actions to align with our own true nature. As we begin to gain control and step back from manufactured desires, we also begin to take control of our given sense of empowerment.
Every Penny Matters
Parents work hard to plan for their children’s welfare, but often forget to teach the basics of money management. Balancing allowances between toys, savings and education can be a fun and interactive process that aids to motivate and engage children with finance. Teaching children the art of patience in watching as their money grows in a savings account, and how balancing the needs of today with the needs of the future is an important lifelong strategy. But despite efforts, children often learn by observing their parents spending habits, and the value that parents place on money. Money matters at all stages of life. Developing life-long skills starts early and involves carving out time to teach children that savings is not a luxury, but a necessary part of life.
Childhood Reflections
During my childhood, my only access to the outside world was magazines. Although TV was available, it was accessible with limited viewing. The only learnings I can recall from primary school were history and story-telling. Below I have described three key experiences that may have contributed towards my relationship with finance.
Pennies for my sister
My first example is when my sister, a few years older than me would enter my class just before break and provide my teacher with a few pennies. These were handed to me, which I’d use at the small school tuck-shop that my sister managed. Although a simple action, this experience had a strong impact given it was the first example of receiving money. In a world where you can express anything, this expression of kindness installed within me a sense of security that someone will provide for me. I feel this may have shaped most of my early adult years by not having fear of lack in relation to money. I will touch on the shadow impact of this experience in future issues.
Threads to Pounds
My next example relates to my experience of working at a sewing factory. At the age of 12 I received my first pay-check. I worked along side my sister who was a year older than me. We walked to the factory two evenings after school, and on Saturday mornings. Our job was to cut the threads of garments sewn by the older women. I enjoyed the excuse to be out of the house. The exposure fulled my little mind with creative fictional stories about the handful of colourful sewing women who sewed not only for the money, but also for a sense of connection with the outside world. None of these women spoke English. Through this experience, I was taught to appreciate the exchange of a simple service for a valued commodity - money. Money that was needed by my mother to purchase basic necessities.
Work to Live
My third and more emotionally charged experience with money relates to observations of my father’s approach to finances. My father expressed little ambition to move into a nicer house, to buy fancy furniture, or to use money to impress others. Money he earned was used on a transactional basis. His income went towards the basics of running the house, socializing, and the reminder he saved for his daughters dowries. He worked the minimum months each year to qualify for government benefits. His life did not revolve around work, his work revolved around his life. Whereas I have lived to work, rather than worked to live. This opposite approach I have taken could be due to the fear and resentment I had held towards my father. Even though my life has revolved around work, I like my father, lacked the desire for material success.
Breaking free from financial conditioning
Our childhood exposures can help support or hinder our adult financial experiences. Each day we have an opportunity to re-build with understanding, acceptance and love. By using our awareness, we can begin to chip away at the mould residing within and create a life of self-powering financial experiences.
Self reflection exercise
Next we will explore an exercise which will aim to reflect upon your initial relationships with money. Dedicate a journal to this journey, this could be on-line, or hard copy. Find a quiet safe place to sit.
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Close your eyes and take 15 minutes, or as needed to reflect on your childhood (up to the age of 12) experiences with money.
When you are ready, write three key recollections in your journal.
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Once written, spend five minutes to reflect on these experiences. During the process be aware of your emotions.
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Once you are done, put aside your journal, then close your eyes. Feel your physical body. Notice if it feels tight, numb, light, or neutral. Just observe for a few moments.
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Now open your eyes and light a candle. Watch the light of the candle for five minutes, with each moment breath in the light, and let go of anything that you are holding onto. Feel all emotion leaving your body and burning itself into the flame of love, and allow the light of acceptance to wash over you.
It’s not possible to change past experiences, but it is possible to engage with past experiences to help build awareness in changing unwanted patterns. Once you surrender to the process, your reflections will begin to build awareness and impact your decisions. It is not necessary to dwell on past patterns, but more to find an understanding of what drives your decisions. After journaling let go of any unwanted emotions, allowing them to subside into the abyss. Taking accountability and small steps with the use of mindful approaches are the beginnings of creating a journey of self-awareness, self-empowerment and self-compassion. With openness we can realise that it’s possible to maneuver from financial anxiety towards a pathway of financial independence.
Thank you for taking part in this our first issue of Asian Money Matters. In the next issue I will explore the teenagers journey with money. I hope that through these discussions I am able to shed light on this subject, but more importantly, to start chipping away at the stigma of money, and help inspire you to look just a bit closer at how you interact with the financial landscape that surrounds you.
The following is a quote written by Rupi Kaur.
“What’s the greatest lesson a woman should know? That since day one she already had everything she needs within herself. It’s the world that convinced her she did not.”
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